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Hey friends! I’ve been thinking a lot about the podcast and I’m excited for 2019! First, a minute or two of announcements and then some intimate content.

So, I’ve released all free episodes posted on my public podcast to any patron on my patreon ad free. Free episodes now go to any patron giving any amount of support ad free. It’s a thank-you for being awesome and supporting me. I also created a new, less expensive tier to help out those who want to help support my work but can’t afford the five fifty for premium content. I’m releasing a portion of my premium episodes to them. It’ll probably look like 50% for free, 70% for giving a little, and all of it for giving a bit more.

Okay, content time. I’ve been wondering more about exploring my episode introductions and creating something interesting in that space that feels less artificial and that shares more of my personal experience of the episode.

On listening to my podcast and comparing it with other podcasts, I feel like I’m missing a personal touch. I’m so caught up with my fear of criticism stemming from an intense feeling of worthlessness, that I’m ironically not being as vulnerable as I could be.

I put a lot of time and thought into illustrating a complete picture with the topics in focus and am starting to think I want to illustrate an authentic picture with more of the people behind the topics in focus. That doesn’t mean I want to take the topics out of focus. I want to expand what’s in focus to better give an even more complete picture. This is why I’ve been starting to explore hitting record earlier and including some banter before the podcast starts.

I try to make things work here on a shoestring budget. For two budget cardioid condenser mics, mic stands, pop filters, and 3 pin DMX cables, and a splurge on my Uphoria audio USB interface which was a couple hundred. I’m now at the point finally at the close of 2018 where I’ve paid for any advertising and equipment costs and am starting to look at costs of living and what portion of my month I can dedicate to making this project excellent. 

It only seems fair that the more I’m supported on patreon, the more I can give my time to patreon and the work you lovely people want me to do. I’m going to likely go to a semi annual format for seasons so I can do 26 episodes on one season instead of 6 or 12 which will save me some time creating intros and outros. 

Also, a weekly format is actually quite demanding. I’m debating going to a biweekly format which I’ve been intensely avoiding as I want to keep the content weekly so I can hit a hundred episodes in roughly a year and a half. We’re almost a third of the way there, by the way.

Finally, I want to start offering more words of support. I acknowledge that plenty of folks listening to these recordings are having their own struggles with intimacy and vulnerability and I think validating others and encouraging them to keep going and to know that they’re not alone is showing up on my radar as important to me.

And with that, I’ll channel my inner Kye Plant who has an awesome podcast about mental illness called Feelin’ Weird, and end my state of the podcast annual address with kindness around the stresses of the winter season and hope for the new year.

It’s okay to be exactly where you are. Your feelings are valid, even the ones you don’t share. Your struggles are real. There isn’t really a thing called normal. Remember that this hard thing you’re dealing with right now; this too will pass. If you’re feeling overwhelmed right now, just remember that you’re going to make it. I’ve been having those days this winter as well. I think we’re both gonna make it.

This is Victor with love, signing off for 2018.